Hospital and reflection on my TIA

Sitting in the hospital waiting to have a transcranial  Doppler test so I had time to jot a few thoughts on being back at work. 

It's always strange to notice that not much changes even after three months of being away. Issues remain the same. Can one fellowship/ church find a new space to do their mission? If not what happens next? Another on the surface has had offers to take on responsibilities for day to day running in the life of their church. But is that addressing the need to discern a sense of mission? Really it means just keeping going as they are. It all feels like going around in circles and not very life giving.......

So in for my test . The stroke nurse was excellent in explaining the procedure and the outcome which was I neither have a hole in the heart of a shunt so another test ticked off and one to go. 

Has to be said afresh we are really fortunate to have the health service we do. It really needs protecting as a national health service free at the point of delivery. 

Then a couple weeks later I saw the consultant who confirmed the results with just one test to go if I want it. She noticed I had lost weight looked  well and my cholesterol had come down by diet and exercise. Yes I had come off the statins. So it it appears its up to me take a different one of not. It reduces the risk of another TIA by 40% but I am taking a blood thinner so reducing risk anyway . The jury is out for me and I am in no rush to take another tablet. 

Now no one wants to experience a TIA or have more, and how thankful I am I did not experience a full blown stroke. I have sadly in the course of my ministry visited many people who have. Some have recovered well and many have not. It really can be a cruel cutting short of peoples quality of life. 

 However the TIA has made me stop and take stock of life. Yes I really do want to live for a good number of years yet and to do so healthfully. So I have reappraised my lifestyle. So many times I have sought to control the workload but always it encroaches. Days off never happening even though I fully thought I would swap the day because a need meant I lost it. Then I had tried to work only two sections of a day but again the need to put some meeting in the diary drove that one away. Even doing exercise and going to a gym became a need to rush there and away for a meeting etc so what benefit it may have given was lost. Then again what have all the meetings I have attended and even led been really about? The sustaining of a way of doing church that no longer works, as well as a cycle of meetings that never actually arrive at decisions. The latter out of fear of doing things differently. You can always tell this because people always say we are working towards doing it differently. I say the way you travel is the destination as well. No I didn't say that someone else did, but I can't remember who, it was so long ago I read that. I do however think its true.

Now I have an inner voice that insists I take control of the diary. Morning and afternoon commitments then its an evening blocked. Morning and evening out then its afternoon off. Well, if as ministers do work six days, then it is the only real way to stay healthy. In going to the gym putting aside time not to rush means it becomes a positive experience. What I have discovered is I am beginning to reconnect with people because I have time. Deliberately I chose not to have the car so I now walk more and reconnect not just with people but the environment I work and live within. Moving at a slower pace I suspect is to move at God's pace. The God who has time for all people, and never overlooks the most vulnerable, who we often miss in our rushing around. Having made more time to bread make, bake and cook is in fact about slowing down and connecting with the earth and with God. A microwave or ready cooked meal never does connect you with the creation that provides all our needs. So a partly frustrating day this week and beginning to feel annoyed, was calmed by baking some mini biscuits for our amazing neighbours who keep bringing us food. 

.......So perhaps one more medical test and I will be liberated from the hospital books. I pray however I will never be stupid enough again to think I can go on working seven days a week, three sessions a day and still be healthy. So thank God for a TIA and that by the Grace of God I am both alive and healthy.

Journey home

Awoke up to blue skies and with a quick trip into Vamos to get breakfast we were soon eating our croissants on the balcony to fortify us for the journey home. Leaving a little earlier than planned turned out good as signposts in Crete are not great. So having gone the wrong way we had to double back on  ourselves   to get back in time to drop off the car. Only trouble with air flights is the waiting around at airports.

So sitting in the shade but outside there is time to add to the blog. If all goes smoothly we should be home by 5pm which is not bad at all. That will be helpful as it will be up first thing to drive to see dad in hospital in Kings Lynn. So I guess a round trip that will take 6 hours minimum driving. 

It's been one of the most relaxing holidays I can ever remember, helped by the almost wall to wall sunshine. The friendliness of the locals speaks volumes about hospitality  we have enjoyed. The lack of a need to travel miles to sit on beaches or visit historic sites has been a bonus when what you really need is to just take it easy.

My must read book for  recommendation is Victoria Hislop's 'The Thread'. It is a superbly written story with background knowledge of Greece's often turbulent history giving it a depth that makes it a book of quality. 

As I write we are now flying over Greece mountains rising up towards the clouds and beautiful sea and lakes give the place a magical feel. Bit like Sheffield!

Well we arrived at Leeds Bradford airport to grey clouds and yes rain. A drop in temperature down to 15 C the pilot said sorry.

 Hopes for a speedy car journey were dashed as traffic problems meant it took more than two hours to get home. However we were greeted with warmth and hospitality on our return. A neighbour had married at the weekend, and sadly being on holiday we were not able to attend, but food arrived not long after getting into the house. So that resolved what to have to eat. 

Lazy lazy days!

Our holiday cottage is called Mandarin and you can just about see them forming on the tree outside our   door. It's so lovely here we have to force ourselves to go out, and as it was Sunday we truly had a day of rest. A couple of swims and lots of reading and really only going out in the evening for a meal at a recommended restaurant. On route we took a detour to what turned out to be a locked church in the grounds of a ruined monastery. 

The restaurant was good but with three tiny dishes given with bread before we even ordered, and the frozen grapes taken from the owners vine hanging above us, you forget how filling eating a meal can be. Needless to say we were not hungry when we woke in the morning.

Modern technology keeps us in touch with family. So news of my dad having seriously fractured his thigh and needing an operation means waiting to hear how the operation goes Monday afternoon and a trip over Wednesday morning to see him.

Well today has meant greater activity as we headed for lake Kournas and a pedalo ride for an hour with blue skies above. 

We stopped at a small sea side resort on the way back before taking an afternoon to just sit by the pool. Then having taken out the fallen leaves,  

hardly onerous in the sun and heat, a final opportunity to swim read and not overeat.  

So our holiday ends as we fly back tomorrow morning. From the warmth of 90 F to a much cooler Sheffield. We hope the garden has been looked after by a neighbours son who has been doing the watering.

August 15th Rethymno

The weather resumed it's warm light filled course this morning. Once again a gentle start with breakfast on the balcony and a good read of a book which saw two now completed and into a third. One of the hallmarks of our holidays, even with the girls, was the way we were able to spend time reading. The girls once at a certain age could swap their books and their bags would bulge with books. Today Kindle's make it so easy to take lots of reading matter away.

We finally decided we better venture out and headed for the third largest town on the island.  It has the amazing sight of a Venetian castle/fort over looking the harbour and town. Within it was the original cathedral that became a mosque and now an open space.

 It contained within it a modern piece of art work 'flying over the abyss'. Within the space it was very effective. 

The views out from the fort a delight as we just worked our way around the vast ruin. 

The need for refreshment saw us head for a restaurant on the harbour front and for the second day running to our amusement we had chosen the right time to stop and sit under a canopy. The sky darkened and down came the rain ruining the restaurants business as the manager explained to us. We had our coffee and beer at a leisurely pace  and when the rain lessened we headed off to go and see the folk museum. Typical!  it was closed no wonder the country is not doing well. It only opens in the mornings. 

So we headed back to the cottage and a refreshing swim.

The 15th August is the feast of the Assumption and there was to be an outdoor event in our village.

So having eaten in Vamos we went to look at the church in Listarda all decorated, and then to the village open space now filled with chairs, tables and hundreds of people. 

Mass catering was on the go as family and friends gathered ready for the performance of a famous singer. This of course did not get going till 11pm so we went back and forth from our cottage when we heard the singing starting. Jill said it must be the Kate Rusby of Greece. I finally fell to sleep inspite of the singing into the early hours. Only Two full days left.

White Mountains - Crete

The White Mountains - Crete

Against the distinct evening sky 

it appears as if with a granite pencil

a silhouette has been drawn.

A distinct line as if all the mountains were just one.

A ridge you could walk along.

The more complex detail of rough rock,

valleys, shrubs and trees all gone.

Just one continuing line.

Creator God

these mountains have witnessed

so many cultures, empires, faiths.

Still they stand resolutely

Weather worn.

May our trust in you 

stand as firm.

Lord Jesus

these mountains have witnessed

times when people have lived side by side,

culture and faith not torn asunder.

May we re- learn 

To live your hospitality

And welcome all.

Holy Spirit

these mountains have witnessed

Wind, snow, rain and sun.

May we feel your presence

in all experiences of our lives,

and come to understand that you are 

there in all of life.

Amen.

                                                         Mark Goodhand August 2015

   

Change of plans and Chania instead

The intention was to go to Knossos but instead we headed west for Chania and it turned out to be a good move. The morning was fine and chance to walk around the old town. In particular the Venetian harbour. The place was lined with a variety of eating places. The mosque now a gallery.

We headed around the harbour out to the lighthouse and it was glorious. Fishermen sorting out their nets.

 Our intention was to visit the synagogue that represented the long gone Jewish community that sadly died when a British ship sank the boat they were being taken away in during the war.

 As it was getting on we thought a spot of lunch first and so found a place for a meal thankfully inside the restaurant not at the front. Covered by the main awning. So we had an enjoyable Meze meal.

Then the skies turned dark. The thunder clashed and the lightning flashed and a torrential downpour engulfed Chania. We watched as diners at the front rushed further inside leaving food behind. The waiter clung to the front awning to hold it down as the wind began to lift it, and of course he received both laughter and applause. Glad we were still having coffee we made it last even longer as we waited for the  worst to abate before we decided we would have to head back for the car and the cottage. As the day drew to a close the sky cleared and the heat built up again. A fun day spent in the beautiful old town of Chania with an image of a waiter clinging to the awning.

Sitting under the stars

It's the end of another beautiful, warm and restful day. Breakfast on the balcony moved into reading a book which I completed and so I can recommend 'The children act' by Ian McEwan. Then time for a refreshing swim. It must be hot Jill couldn't resist either and following a light lunch we had to take another dip to cool off.

Time then for a proper exploration of the village of Vamos. On arrival  we felt we needed some refreshment so to a local cafe/ bar for a cold drink. Well hospitality kicked in once more. First a bottle of cold water while we waited for two cold beers to arrive. Yet with our drinks came nibbles of small breads, cheese and ham. The glasses had even been frozen to retain the cold of our drinks. So we sat and watched the world go by. A local rolled up with his open truck and hung his scales. He then proceeded to sell water melons and tomatoes while nipping for a drink as well. Finally we wandered the narrow streets and popped into two churches. The first a large one and it did not feel right to take a photo.  No one was in the second so here is a quick view of the smaller church.

It was then time to cook an evening meal on our return and we finally met our neighbours in the next door cottage who had arrived in the early hours.  They should have been here Tuesday too but got bumped off their plane by easy Jet at Manchester . So we no longer have the pool to ourselves!

So the day ends sitting on the balcony under the stars and a cooler evening which is great. The plan is to visit Knossos tomorrow so an early start to avoid both the heat and the tourists. We have not exactly made early starts so far so we shall see.

Its a beautiful day

Waking up and having breakfast with a backcloth of the mountains is amazing. They look as if they have a dusting of snow but it's just the light hitting the rock surface.

The opportunity to just sit read a book and then to take a swim in the pool so refreshing in the very warm atmosphere. 

Finally we ventured out for a drive as we wanted to see the sea. After a winding route via Kefalas it was a rock beach with folk swimming in crystal clear waters. However we decided to turn back and went a bit further west along hairpin turns. I offered to do my James Bond driving but Jill firmly said no. So to Georgioupoli and a sandy beach with hotels and restaurants and a very typical sea side resort.

 There was a rock walkway out to a chapel with icons we think to St Nicholas. Of course it is Orthodox with beautiful icons.

and so I lit a candle.

Then a drive back via Vamos to buy bread, and I succumbed to a cake thankfully shared with Jill otherwise I will need to go running to work off the calories. 

It is so very restful here and constant warm weather just makes it.

So an evening meal under the trees to complete a wonderful day. 

Cheap Flights

The announcement that you could buy 'hello' magazine on board and the special offers of coffee and snack for £3.50 meant I knew I was on the Ryanair plane heading for Crete.

Persuaded that we didn't need to arrive at airport in usual Goodhand fashion 'two hours before' we arrived with just enough time to grab something to eat and drink not having had breakfast. Well who wants to eat at 3.30am. 

Then onto plane and a smooth journey that saw us arrive early. Once out of the airport we picked up the hire car and drive to Manderin cottage ,  in Listarda stopping off for basic supplies.

The cottage is a delight with the balcony looking out towards the mountains. I can see the temptation to stay here, read, sun bath, use the pool  and force ourselves to head into the small town of Vamos for an evening meal. 

This of course we did this first evening especially as it's Jill's birthday. 

Getting to grips with the language is going to be interesting but we managed to order a delicious meal and when the bill arrived I could see why many Brits come here. 

Amazing value and once again on my travels the sense of hospitality shown at the restaurant with little extras to make you feel welcome. 

Even the small dogs wandering around was in keeping.

Sunday comes around so quickly

Welł it really was back to normal with a service at our Pitsmoor Church followed by an informal Church Council as we explored the future. Big issues to work through. Having determined the church wants to stay together, but knowing the building is consuming resources of peoples energy, gifts, finance, they have already decided to sell the property. Finding somewhere to continue the work however is not proving easy and may well not be possible. Pitsmoor is not alone in Methodism in having a property that has seen its day. So the challenge is on to determine what God is saying.

Then it was catch up time on paperwork that needed dealing with before leading worship at our Warren chapel. It is quite a while since I have been there as with the new circuit I find myself in a variety of places. So it was good to see some familiar faces. 

Well I have had requests for the next section of my second book so here it is.part number four........enjoy

Of course the burning down of a chapel was one thing, helping members on their way was another…..

But you had to understand that working with people for a small remuneration while all the time being the one who took the blame that was another. Once or twice you put up with it but when people lied and threw onto you their emotional problems then it can become just too much. So it was that Peter had to be dealt with. He was the sort of chap everyone thought was wonderful because he was always at church doing things, more like interfering, ensuring he got his own way taking no notice of the rules that govern life. But for all his talk of serving God he had a blind spot, his family, or to be precise his children. Oh yes they were talented, but so were other peoples children. But to Peter they could do no wrong even when they caused trouble in the life of his beloved chapel. And who took the blame well of course Roger. It was Roger who would not let them do what they want. It was Roger who stood in the way of change. It was Roger who really had achieved nothing in seven years in the place. God clearly knew nothing either as it was God who had brought Roger here. Well Peter upset him once too often. Now Roger knew that everyone knew that Peter thought he could do just what he liked even when driving. How many near misses he had goodness only knows, but here was the answer. Roger had met Michael at the rehabilitation group that the probationer service had run for young people with the problem of stealing cars. He was essentially a good lad with problems at home. Dad had been in prison, nothing major just minor offences. Mum had gone on the streets to make ends meet, and Michael had been left alone once too often. But he knew how to drive and how to fix cars. He had even fixed Roger’s car for him years later when they had come across each other again. Michael was then running his own business, car mechanic. Michael it was who had shown Roger how to make a vehicle safe and of course ‘unsafe’ for driving in such a way it would be doubtful if anyone would know. Well Peter was due to drive the mini bus later one day to go and pick a group of people up and he would of course go down the motorway. Peter being Peter would never go at a safe speed! The Mini bus was parked round the back of the church hidden away from view. Taking the keys to the gate Roger let himself in and locked the gate behind him. He then proceeded to ‘fix’ the vehicle. It would be fine for a few miles at low speed but when it hit the motorway well that would be different. Of course there was the slight worry about other road users but that couldn’t be helped, besides Peter would do all he could to avoid hitting anyone. And so it turned out to be that at 2.30pm one Wednesday afternoon a minibus being driven at excess speed crashed off the motor way killing the driver but thankfully no one else. The inquiry found that the driver had driven at a reckless speed for such a vehicle and everyone though sad had said typical of Peter! And yes of course Roger took the funeral allowing the beloved children to take part, well Roger didn’t want to have to say things and be a hypocrite let others say them instead. 

Back in action and a rest day cat sitting

Well it didn't take long . A trawl through my e.mails deleting the majority revealed what has and has not been happening within the circuit. Playing catch up means taking  on board lots of information without having been party to the various conversations. It just shows how as wonderful as modern technology is e.mails in themselves can muddy the waters. They just don't convey what you need to know and increasingly I will want to avoid using them in future.

So I am still left wondering what can be really done to lighten  my pastoral load and I am not very hopeful. But I remain determined not to return to a manic work pattern. So its two sessions a day.

So following meetings on Wednesday we had a rest day swap. This saw us go into action to help daughter number two as a gap in cat sitting had arisen. So a trip south saw two very happy cats greet us as we walked into feed them. Meg and Jeffrey house cats and the later a very nervous character. For once they allowed us to stroke them they know which side their butter is on!

So day off saw us give morning and evening feeds and then a morning feed and trip back to Sheffield. So what to do with a rest day?

Well it turned into a lovely day as we headed first into Banbury

and then a visit to Broughton Castle and grounds.

The history was fascinating and the gardens a delight. So back to work once more and services at Pitsmoor and Warren this weekend.

On saying goodbye to the cats we had to go and find them with Meg sitting happily on a cottage beam.

Even a day away meant the garden began to wilt without a daily water. So its harvest more courgettes,

and see the green beans at last getting going. Finally I spotted a tomato is beginning to turn red at last.
While in Banbury we succumb to temptation as they had a market and we ended up buying another climbing rose.